February 16, 2016February 16, 2016 “Pride And Prejudice And Zombies” (** out of four) was a dreary horror thriller set in 19th century England centering around five sisters who try to cope with the pressures of marrying and coming into womanhood in their strict upper-class surroundings while also trying to stay alive from an escalating population of zombies. Reasonably well-directed and handsomely shot but this attempt to merge historical fiction, classical melodrama, and zombie thriller ingredients doesn’t gel. At least it’s a far improvement over “Abraham Lincoln: Witch Hunter”. Continue reading →
February 16, 2016 “Lazer Team” (*1/2 out of four) was an ultra-dumb action comedy about four losers who wouldn’t be able to get into the McDonald’s School Of Fast Food Knowledge but are somehow selected to save the world when they stumble onto a UFO site that (yawn) threatens worlwide destruction. Aimed squarely at kids with low-attention spans or for those who find the “Mighty Morphin Power Rangers” too intellectually challenging. Stay home and play laser tag instead. Continue reading →
February 15, 2016 “Sociopathica” (*1/2 out of four) was a sociopathically ugly and violent mess about a young woman (Tammy Jean) terrified of being alone who lures women back to her house and when they attempt to leave, she sadistically murders them and keeps their body parts as props and living dolls but things start to get a little complicated when she falls in love for the first time and starts to really lose her grip on reality. Whoever came up with this script and story evidently lost their grip on reality (and psychosis) a long time ago as well. Plenty of sex and nudity for those who want it but you’ll be satisfied after about half an hour. Not exactly one of the kinds of movies that makes the world a better place. Continue reading →
February 13, 2016 “Hell Fire” (*1/2 out of four) was a laughably dumb, ugly Redbox melodrama about a small-town redneck (J. Scott Green) who is actually The Antichrist and is mistakenly kidnapped by a group of hookers and drug addicts and he causes them to be possessed by demonic forces and gradually turn on one another! The kind of movie that makes you want to take a shower immediately afterwards! The kind of movie also which makes you wonder who the hell thought of this story and who decided it should be filmed? Continue reading →
February 13, 2016 “Stag Hunt” (* out of four) was a staggering bore about four friends who embark on a “stag weekend” in Dartmoor but are pursued one-by-one by a legendary monstrous beast who they previously thought never existed. You can surely bet just about all of the cast wish this movie never existed either. Horror fans would do much better “hunting” for a much better movie with more thrills and scares, of which this movie has none. Continue reading →
February 13, 2016 “Cabin Fever” (** out of four) was a needless remake of the 2002 Eli Roth horror thriller which was no great shakes to begin with about five friends who go on a vacation getaway but are gradually killed by a mysterious flesh-eating virus. What the hell is the point of remaking a movie only 14 years old if you’re going to use the exact same script of the original? Not a bad remake per se but completely unnecessary. Horror filmmakers may need to get originality fever to start coming up with some new ideas sometime soon. Continue reading →
February 13, 2016 “The Choice” (**1/2 out of four) was a virtual anthology of Nicholas Sparks movie cliches that somehow still manages to tug at your heartstrings. In sunny North Carolina, two neighbors (Benjamin Walker and Teresa Palmer) meet cute over their dogs who fall in love. Naturally, they hate each other at first but then……Eleventh film version of Sparks’ novels is alternately heavy-handed, endearing, and silly but Palmer’s terrific performance and a powerful final third make this hard to resist. Fans of Sparks’ movies should make the choice to check this out; others needn’t bother. Continue reading →
February 13, 2016 “Deadpool” (**1/2) was an over-the-top but fairly entertaining comic book action thriller about a smirking vigilante (Ryan Reynolds) who finds out he has terminal cancer and is reborn into a crime-fighting superhero bent on saving his city from destruction. Occasionally funny but also occasionally silly and sometimes too flip and too cute for its own good. Reynolds’ performance ranges from fun to annoying. He needs to realize that acting doesn’t always mean being the coolest guy in the room. A mixed bag but worth it for comic-book fans. Continue reading →
February 10, 2016 “Southbound” (*** out of four) was a chilling horror thriller about five interlocking stories following the fates of several travellers on a deserted stretch of desert highway as they are all pursued to the death. No classic and clearly inspired by other horror anthology movies such as “Tales From The Darkside” and “Creepshow” but is more gripping and engrossing than most horror movies over the last year. Second anthology story involving a female band is the best; the fifth one may remind viewers a lot of “The Purge.” Continue reading →
February 10, 2016 “My All American” (*** out of four) was an affectionately made biographical drama of college football player Freddie Steinmark (Finn Whitrock) who achieved his goal of playing football for the University Of Texas and gave his all for his coach (Aaron Eckhart) and his team, both on and off the field. Predictable and formulaic sports drama in the vein of “Friday Night Lights” and “Varsity Blues” is enlivened by strong performances all around and hard-hitting football scenes. Powerful directing debut for Angelo Pizzo who knows this territory extremely well because he was the writer and producer of “Hoosiers” and “Rudy” which this is also influenced by. Continue reading →
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