“Suburban Coven” (* out of four) was a disastrously lame and dull melodrama about a newlywed couple (Elle Taylor and David Ford) who suffer a traumatic accident and then enter a period of sexual dysfunction and are subsequently pulled into a dangerous game involving their mysterious new neighbors (James Burleson and Tiffany Griffin) but this puts them all in personal and psychological danger with one another. Promoted as a horror movie which it is not although the bad acting and writing gets to be pretty scary after a while. Subpar suburban psychodrama feels like reheated David Lynch from “Blue Velvet” and “Twin Peaks” but the recipe is awfully stale by now.