March 8, 2022 “Romeo And Juliet Killers” (*1/2 out of four) was an overstylized and trendy melodrama about a rebellious young teen (Leigha Sinnott) and her boyfriend (Zachary Roozen) who decide to murder her oppressive mother (Kelly Sullivan) in California and then take it on the run and attempt suicide themselves to die together and live on in infamy. Or something like that. Allegedly based on a true story but almost everything in it rings false and hollow. It’s hard to make a young-lovers-on-the-run movie when you don’t like (or care) about either of them. Continue reading →
March 8, 2022 “The Fourth Musketeer” (*1/2 out of four) was a stiff retelling of the legendary Alexander Dumas story showing a young D’Artagnan (Matt Ingram-Jones) who travels from Gascony to Paris where he immediately becomes embroiled in an escalating war between the Musketeers (Ade Dimberline, Richard Ingle, Sean Cronin) and the guardsman (Ciaran Davies) of Cardinal Richelieu. Umpteenth version of this story is drably shot and inert. Watch the 1993 version of “The Three Musketeers” or eat the candy bar instead. Continue reading →
March 7, 2022 “The Batman” (** out of four) was a hollow return to Gotham City as Batman (Robert Pattinson) continues his crime-fighting vigilance but soon finds himself up against the triple threat of The Penguin (Colin Farrell unrecognizable under a mountain of latex), The Riddler (Paul Dano), and Catwoman (Zoe Kravitz) all while uncovering ties to his own family legacy that question his own path in life. Director Matt Reeves works in an operatic mood and style that harks back to Christopher Nolan (and also shows influences of “Chinatown” and “Blade Runner”) but film is heavy and slow-going and long at nearly three hours without much reward. Film covers the usual Batman themes of vengeancy, betrayal, and secrecy…….but you still may wish it were more “fun” and entertaining. Pattinson is definitely impressive as the Dark Knight but Dano and Farrell are over-the-top and annoying. Continue reading →
March 5, 2022 “A Day To Die” (**1/2 out of four) was a gritty action potboiler about a parole officer (Kevin Dillon) who kills someone in the line of work while protecting an employee but soon finds out that he has crossed street lines and a ruthless street thug (Leon) has targeted him and his family for extermination; in desperation, he turns to his military brother (Frank Grillo) for help but complications arise when they find out this all has ties to the city’s corrupt police chief (Bruce Willis) who may have targeted all of them. Overstuffed movie takes on more than it can chew but is still overall compellingly done. First-rate cast makes all the difference here and gives this extra charge. Continue reading →
March 5, 2022 “After Yang” (** out of four) was an earnest but dull melodrama set in the future in which a workaholic and emotionally distant father (Colin Farrell) comes to reconnect with his wife (Jodie Turner-Smith) and the rest of his family when their artificial intelligence helper breaks down and forces them all to once again re-establish communication and thus love. Yet another pretentious allegory about the dangers of technology and how it results in distance and drives one and other apart; Farrell is good as usual but it’s awfully precious and self-important. Adapted from an award-winning short children’s story “Saying Goodbye To Yang” by Alexander Weinstein but something apparently got lost in translation. Continue reading →
March 5, 2022 “Nightride” (**1/2 out of four) was an audaciously done melodrama shot in a single one take showing an underworld dealer (Moe Dunford) out for a long drive in the twilight hours of the night about to make one more deal before he leaves his criminal life behind and attempts to go straight but the night has twists and turns that make this anything but easy. As a film experiment- it is highly impressive with dazzling mood and style. As a vehicle for star Dunford- it works as he definitely holds the screen. As a drama and suspense thriller- it never really delivers, holding you in its grip but never shifting into high-gear. Still overall worth watching. Film definitely shows the influence of director Michael Mann (“Collateral” especially) so much so that characters cite his films in the middle. Continue reading →
March 5, 2022 “After The Pandemic” (* out of four) was a rockbottom clinker set in another (yawn) futuristic wasteland in which a pandemic has wiped away 98% of Earth but two survivors (Eve James and Kannon Smith) meet and become intrigued with one another’s way of life and survival which changes their outlook and hope for the future. Genuinely bizarre movie can’t decide whether it’s a shoddy action story, an empty commentary on today’s pandemic, or an incomprehensible love story so all it succeeds at is putting you to sleep. Even at only 80 minutes, this is akin to being in I.C.U. Continue reading →
March 4, 2022 “Hell Is Empty” (0 stars out of four):……….but it’s nothing compared to the movie itself. Ludicrous religious psychobabble about a self-styled messiah (Travis Mitchell) who initiates a teenage runaway (Meredith Antoian) into his unstable cult of sister-wives (Nia Farrell, Spencer Peppet, and others) but her rebellious nature triggers an uprising and a revolt against him and his domineering ways. Loaded with unintentional laughs and terrible acting and dialogue and heavy-handed sermonizing that make this feel like an endless Sunday in church. Strictly for those who thought Shymalahan’s “The Village” was in dire need of retelling and a remake. Continue reading →
March 4, 2022 “Crow Valley” (*1/2 out of four) was a lusterless suspense thriller about a mountain biker (Josh Conn) off on a weekend ride who is attacked in a brutal hit-and-run and awakens in a cabin where he is imprisoned by a woman (Nicole Freeman) with serious psychiatric problems and he has to try to heal up and turn the tables on her to escape. Countless man-in-peril/man-has-to-escape film is bathed in unpleasantness and ugly violence. Star Conn also wrote and directed this and one hopes he’s a better mountain biker than actor or filmmaker. Continue reading →
March 4, 2022 “Bull Shark” (**1/2 out of four) was an agreeably done thriller about another ravenous shark that’s on the loose this time in a small Texas town in which the concerned local law enforcement (Thom Hallum and Derrick Redford) hurry to track it down while the local mayor (Richard Ray) wants to hush things and keep it quiet so as not to scare away local tourist money. Yes, it’s another killer-shark-on-the-loose movie ripped off from “Jaws” (and “Jaws 3” in particular in this case) but this has sharper teeth than most other imitations, thanks to a stronger-than-usual screenplay and characterizations, solid acting, and also crisp cinematography from Jeff Hamm. No classic but far better than most other “bull” you find at Redbox. Continue reading →
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