August 9, 2020 “Made In Italy” (** out of four) was a trite comedy drama about a struggling artist (Liam Neeson) and his young son (Micheal Richardson) who travel to Italy to sell the house he inherited from his late wife but complications ensue when they both realize that personally and emotionally they are unable to let the house go. Neeson’s effortless charisma and likeability does all that it can to keep this movie afloat but it’s ploddingly told and never particularly moving or funny. Him and Richardson are real life father-and-son which is odd since they don’t have all that much chemistry with one another. Arrivederci! Continue reading →
August 9, 2020 “The Tax Collector” (** out of four) was a gritty crime melodrama set on the seamier side of South Central L.A. involving Latino street gangs and how two tax collectors (Shia Labeouf and Bobby Soto) who work for a local crime boss are caught in an escalating turf war when a rival crime boss tries to reclaim the streets as his own. Yet another violent and ugly crime drama from David Ayer (“End Of Watch”, “Training Day”) which holds your attention with its style and flash but you soon realize there’s not much underneath in the form of story or much context. Labeouf gives it a good try but he’s simply not very convincing as a mumbling Latino thug. Continue reading →
August 9, 2020 “Unbelievable” (** out of four) was an uneven sci/fi comedy about martians conquering Earth and how a team of astronauts and concerned citizens (Snoop Dogg, Garrett Wang, Chase Masterson, and others) attempt to thwart and stop them with the help of powerful plants of marijuana. Cheeky premise is played to the hilt with occasionally amusing resultsm just not enough to sustain a feature-length film. Cheech and Chong could have made this same movie- and funnier- about 30 years ago. Michael Madsen plays the President named Ben Dover, if that gives you a sense of the movie’s sense of humor. Continue reading →
August 9, 2020 “The Secret Garden” (** out of four) was a graceless adaptation of Francis Hodgson Burnett’s classic novel about a young girl (Dixie Egerickx) sent to live with her strict uncle (Colin Firth) and discovers a magical garden hidden at his estate of which has wonders and powers no one could ever imagine. Fourth film version of this story is handsomely mounted but story lacks momentum and is never as magical or compelling as it was on the stage. Some nice moments towards the end brighten things up but it’s overall pretty stuffy and blah. Young girls and hardcore fans of Burnett may like this more. Continue reading →
August 9, 2020 “Paydirt” (*1/2 out of four) was a slack, derivative action thriller about a hard-nosed parolee (Luke Goss) who is just home from prison and dives headfirst back into his former lifestyle of drug-running as him and his crew attempt to find a stolen and buried bag of cash but he soon finds he’s being tracked and investigated by a retired sheriff (Val Kilmer) and his parole officer (Mirtha Michelle) as things get really ugly along the border. By-the-numbers story of drugs, corrupt cops, and border politics cries out for Sam Peckinpah or Walter Hill in their prime. You have to admire Kilmer for continuing to act even after his cancer and tracheotomy (his voice is entirely dubbed) but I doubt this will be the “paydirt” that his career needs. Continue reading →
August 8, 2020 “The Girl In The Crawlspace” (* out of four) was an unendurable bore about the residents (Tom Cherry, Joni Durian,John Bradley Hambrick, and others) of a nowheresville Indiana town and their ensuing personal/psychological problems from a murderer called The Crawlspace Killer. Ironically titled dreck crawls by at a leaden pace and is made even more torturous by terrible acting and performances. Promoted as a horror movie which it is not; film is only a little more than an hour long but sometimes less really is more. Continue reading →
August 8, 2020 “Black Water: Abyss” (** out of four) was a logy sequel to the 2007 horror thriller set in Northern Australia in which five friends (Jessica McNamee, Luke Mitchell, Amali Golden, and others) descend into a cave and find themselves threatened and terrorized by a ravenous and deadly crocodile. Good-looking and sleek cinematography from Damien Beebe fails to give this the sharpness and bite (no pun intended) that it needs. Some good kills from the crocodile provide a few jolts but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t re-watch “The Descent”, “Crawl”, or even “Crocodile Dundee” again instead. Continue reading →
August 8, 2020 “Shifter” (* out of four) was an abysmal potboiler psychodrama about a young woman (Nicole Fancher) who begins to experience various painful and gruesome side effects after she experiments with time travel and she gradually begins to realize that her plans have backfired. Molasses-moving story is recommended only for those who thought the “Back To The Future” trilogy was in any way overrated; a real bore, despite Fancher’s sincere performance. Film’s underlying theme is how time is precious so don’t waste any of yours on this clunker. Continue reading →
August 7, 2020 “A Murder To Remember” (**1/2 out of four) was an adequately done adaptation of Ann Rule’s novel about a couple (Maddie Nichols and Kevin Rodriguez) celebrating their anniversary on a camping trip which ends with him being killed; as the woman’s memories come piecing back together as she is investigated and interrogated by a seasoned small-town sherriff (Leslie Hendrix), she begins to suspect that there was more to this murder than meets the eye. Directorial debut from Robin Givens is moodily captured with eerie atmospherics and definitely a Hitchcockian storyline but it stops just short of hitting the mark. Final plot twist and finale is curiously subdued, as film holds your attention without fully detonating. Continue reading →
August 7, 2020 “Mile High Escorts” (** out of four) was an earthbound thriller about a young flight attendant (Christina Moore) working for a private airline who becomes strapped financially and becomes involved in the seedy side business of working as an escort for high-rolling executives both in the air and on the ground but doesn’t realize how sleazy and shady this business really is. Neither as hilariously campy or entertainingly provocative or embarrassingly awful as it sounds but film flounders as it never takes off or gets off the ground as it should. Director Sam Irvin tries to inject as much visual style in this as he can but is unable to enrich this thin material. Continue reading →
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