June 17, 2020 “7 Deadly Sins” (*1/2 out of four) was an utterly unimaginative teen horror thriller which commits more than enough sins of its own with annoying characters, cliched dialogue, and by-the-numbers storytelling; a group of teenagers (Tori Vild, Ana Walczak, Gladys Bautista, and others) have a Spring Break party full of the usual sex, drugs, and booze but an evil spirit is soon summoned which takes over the party and causes them all to run for their lives. Disappointing directorial effort from noted character actor Glenn Plummer (“South Central”). Tom Sizemore and Eric Roberts pick up a couple of bucks in meaningless cameos. Continue reading →
June 17, 2020 “Assassin’s Game” (** out of four) was a jumbled action thriller about a secret team of assassins (Venard Adams, Demond Ballou, and others) called the Shadows who are put to the ultimate test in a game of life-and-death in which they turn against each other and yet have to also to team together in order to survive. Lots of action and hand-to-hand combat but nothing to make you terribly involved. After a while, this feels like watching a played video game. Having the assassins called The Shadows is a homage to “The Dark Knight” (as in The League Of Shadows) that this film simply doesn’t deserve. Continue reading →
June 17, 2020 “The Luring” (*1/2 out of four) was an abominable horror show about a man (Jake Katzman) who tries to recover lost memories by returning to his family’s Vermont vacation home where a tragic incident took place which left him institutionalized as a child and left multiple personal/psychological scars on him. In dire need of a coherent script and storyline and a main character who is even slightly likeable; this becomes like a jigsaw puzzle you don’t want to put together. The Vermont scenery is pretty but viewers would best avoid “the lure” of wasting their time on this dreck. Continue reading →
June 16, 2020 “Funhouse” (** out of four) was an underdone horror show about 8 internet celebrities from around the globe (Valter Skarsgard, Khamisa Wilsher, Gigi Saul Guerrero, and others) who compete in an online reality show in which they soon realize they are playing for their very lives and their deaths will soon be broadcast to the entire world. Not the worst of its kind, with some gruesomely imaginative kills and amusing irony, but just a bunch of ideas collected from other and better movies (“The Hunger Games” in particular). By this point- is there really anything left to satirize about social media and the mass commercialism of violence? Continue reading →
June 16, 2020 “The Clearing” (*** out of four) was a fierce horror thriller set during the zombie apocalypse in which a dedicated father (Liam McIntyre) must fight through a Hell wrath of zombies in order to save his daughter (Aundrea Smith) before they’re both turned into zombie brunch and eaten alive. Umpteenth zombie story is livened up and given a fresh coat of paint by unusually vivid and scary zombie attacks and breathless action scenes. Takes its time to get going but once it does there is no letup. Byetheway, this is not a remake of the 2004 Robert Redford/Willem Dafoe drama of the same name. Continue reading →
June 13, 2020 “Darkness Falls” (*1/2 out of four) was a misbegotten murder melodrama about a troubled young detective (Shawn Ashmore) grieving for the recent death of his wife who everyone thinks committed suicide but he then begins to suspect that she was murdered and obsessively trails down all clues, leading to a father/son team (Gary Cole and Richard Harmon) of serial killers whom he swears to bring down. Tired story of serial killers and vengeance and murder doesn’t offer much that’s vitally new to the genre. No relation to the 2003 horror movie of the same time but owes quite a lot to “Death Wish” and (more to the point) “Mad Max.” Continue reading →
June 13, 2020 “Artemis Fowl” (*** out of four) was a frothy adaptation of Eoin Colfer’s blockbuster 2001 novel about the title character (Ferdia Shaw) who becomes a young criminal prodigy who has to search a secret society of fairies (Josh Gad, Lara McDonnell, Adrian Scarborough, and others) to find his missing father (Colin Farrell) but finds that this is a far grander adventure than he realized. Not much story per se but it moves along bouncily and throws so much eye candy and visual effects at you nonstop that it’s fun and entertaining just the same. A nicely done change-of-pace for director Kenneth Brannagh. Continue reading →
June 12, 2020 “The Departure” (**1/2 out of four) was a slight but engaging story about a hot-shot sales manager (Grant Wright Gunderson) who is offered a lucrative promotion for a job in New York; prior to leaving, he asks his best friend (Austin Lauer) to attempt to sleep with his girlfriend (Kendall Chappell) to test her loyalty but this leads to complications and consequences for all of them. Minimalist melodrama yields moderate results but sharp performances from all three keep you watching and keep you involved up till its ending which is unsatisfying and abrupt. Same story told to broader and more comic effect in 1998’s “Kissing A Fool.” Continue reading →
June 12, 2020 “Exit Plan” (** out of four) was a terminally weird and dour story about a man with terminal cancer (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau) who checks into a hotel with mysterious secrets and that specializes in assistance with elaborate suicide plans (!) and it is there that he confronts his own mortality and questions his own reality and grasp on the life that he has left. Coster-Waldau is first-rate but you know hardly anything about him or his various relationships that film generates nothing but a sense of cold aloofness. Some eerie moments to be sure but you may be planning your own exit plan long before the hour-and-a-half is up. Continue reading →
June 12, 2020 “Dating Amber” (*** out of four) was a sweetly affecting story of two gay teenagers (Fionn O’Shea and Lola Petticrew) who decide to tell everyone they’re in a straight relationship to fit in with the rest of society but complications ensue especially when they later discover they actually have feelings for one another and start to fall in love. Not a total success, as film often veers from lighthearted comedy to serious drama, but has enough tender moments and laughs to make it a fun viewing. O’Shea and Petticrew’s strong performances and even stronger chemistry and camaraderie gives film a key boost. Continue reading →
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