“7th Secret” (* out of four) was a lifeless melodrama about an unhappy young wife (Kristin Minter) who decides to seek sexual fulfillment elsewhere and begins exploring the sexual underworld and leading a double life. Probably sounds juicy and sexy but is almost worthless on every level. Natasha Henstridge, Stacey Dash, and Joan Jett are all wasted in meaningless supporting roles; why they signed on for this timewaster might be the film’s real “secret.” Some of the dialogue and acting are laughably awful.

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“The Unbearable Weight Of Massive Talent” (*1/2 out of four) was a rambling action comedy starring Nicolas Cage (playing himself) as an actor who is facing financial ruin in his older years and has to accept a $1 million dollar offer from a dangerous superfan (Pedro Pascal); somehow or another, he is then recruited by a C.I.A. operative (Tiffany Haddish) and has to re-enact some of his most famous roles in order to save the world! Genuinely bizarre story has some amusing touches but is awfully self-indulgent and arbitrary and gets really stupid. Die-hard fans of Cage (I’m not) may obviously like this much more but it’s “unbearable” for most of the rest of us.

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“Measure Of Revenge” (*1/2 out of four) was a muddled psychodrama about a theater actress (Melissa Leo) whose son (Jake Weary) dies from an accidental drug overdose and she then begins her own investigation tracking down the dealer (Bella Thorne) who sold him the drugs and they actually become friends (!) as she goes through her own personal odyssey of deciding whether to avenge her son’s death or not. Potentially interesting moral storyline of whether a drug dealer is responsible for a drug user’s death or not completely eludes the makers of this mess; film’s story goes in all different directions but still goes nowhere slowly.

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“9 Bullets” (** out of four) was an emotionally flat melodrama about a troubled former drug addict (Lena Headey) who goes on the run with a young boy (Dean Scott Vasquez) when both of their lives are threatened by her unstable ex-boyfriend (Sam Worthington). Earnestly done film is given a boost by sincere performances but fires mostly blanks because it never gets going or takes off. Sharon Stone played a similar role in 1999’s bleak (and underrated) “Gloria.”

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“The Cellar” (** out of four) was a stiff-jointed horror thriller about a woman (Elisha Cuthbert) whose daughter mysteriously vanishes in the cellar of her mansion and she soon uncovers that there is a whole lotta paranormal activity going on and that she has to leave before it is too late yet at the same time try to find and save her daughter. Lushly lensed and has good atmosphere but unfortunately story covers all-too-familiar territory (can they please stop making horror movies about haunted houses) and is ploddingly told. Director Brendan Muldowney has Cuthbert looking at television and watching “The Changeling” which covered the same material over 40 years ago!

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“Titanic 666” (*1/2 out of four) was a paltry horror thriller about a crew (Keesha Sharp, Jamie Bamber, Lydia Hearst, and others) aboard the Titanic III who are besieged in the middle of the ocean by dark forces that rise to the surface and threaten everyone on board. Basically a Roger Corman version of “Titanic” but (to put it mildly) these thespians are not up to the level of Leo and Kate and director Nick Lyon is no James Cameron. Cheesy production and feeble writing might make viewers wish this voyage really did hit an iceberg!

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“Brut Force” (*1/2 out of four) was a brutal suspense melodrama about a recently fired reporter (Patricia Velasquez) who returns to her native California town to investigate harassment and corruption at a local vineyard but uncovers a minefield of duplicity and deception that leads to danger at every turn. Velasquez’ terrible performance enacts real “brute force” on the audience but film was already weak and contrived. For a richer and more stirring look at almost the same subject, watch “The Milagro Beanfield War” instead.

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“Gabriel’s Inferno: Part Two” (*1/2 out of four) was a sodden suspense melodrama about the title character Gabriel (Giulio Berruti) who learns the truth about Julia (Melanie Zannetti) but his realization comes too late as she has already left so he is left in a moral quandary about trying to save the relationship and also save himself. Second in the series of the books from author Sylvain Renard is no improvement over the original; a third one is on the way but something tells me the third time won’t be the charm. Strictly for hardcore fans of her novels and those who thought “50 Shades Of Grey” was robbed at Oscar time. This deserves to be thrown in its own “inferno.”

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“Seal Of Desire” (*1/2 out of four) was a sordid psychological suspense thriller about a manipulative psychologist (Markiss McFadden) who specializes in couples-counseling as a means to break up marriages and seduce the wife he’s counseling; his game runs out when he meets a woman (Ravyn Rochelle) even more malicious and manipulative than he is. A vanity project for writer/director/co-producer/star McFadden who can’t get enough of showing himself without his shirt on and takes to rip off “50 Shades Of Grey” and also “Red Shoe Diaries”, just to name a few. It’s movies like this that give counselors (and filmmakers) a bad name.

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“Infinite Storm” (*1/2 out of four) was a flimsy action adventure about a mountain climber (Naomi Watts) who gets caught in the midst of a dangerous blizzard and finds a stranded stranger (Billy Howle) and they both have to fight for survival and try to get down the mountain before nightfall. Watts is rock-solid as usual but is overcome by an avalanche of cliches and plot predictability. Storm effects and mountain scenery are passable given film’s shoestring budget but for an “infinitely” better version of almost the same story watch “Cliffhanger” or “K2” instead.

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