May 5, 2019 “The Convent” (*1/2 out of four) was a wan supernatural thriller set in the 17th century in which a young woman (Rosie Day) is saved from execution and is led to a priory to repent her sins but soon (yawn) finds a greater evil laying within the church which naturally leads to exorcisms and religious upheaval. Yet another horror movie loaded with pretentious religious symbolism and paranormal activity that makes you wish “The Exorcist” had never been made. Michael Ironside is wasted as the magistrate of the church. Is there a chance in Hell that someone can save his career from this kind of junk? Continue reading →
May 5, 2019 “I’ll Take Your Dead” (*1/2 out of four) was a mindless thriller about an older man (Aidan Devine) who works for the underworld and makes bodies disappear that are dumped on his farm acres. When a young girl (Jess Salgueiro) that he finds is still alive, they begin to develop a relationship with one another but her attempted killers from the underworld find out about this and try to show up to finish the job and mayhem ensues. Intriguing premise goes absolutely nowhere, as film soon sputters and becomes tedious and talky and only comes alive in its fiery climax. Devine is good in the lead and does what he can with paper-thin writing. Continue reading →
May 4, 2019 “Life Like” (*1/2 out of four) was a practically lifeless melodrama about a wealthy young couple (James D’Arcy and Addison Timlin) who acquire a robot (Steven Strait) for household help but the more he is at home with them, the creepier and more life-affirming he seems which leads to them all questioning their state of being and the status of their relationships. Derivative and warmed-over story feels like remnants of much better films, specifically “A.I. (Artificial Intelligence)” and “Blade Runner.” Just because the story is centered on a robot doesn’t mean the characters and story have to have such little personality. Continue reading →
May 4, 2019 “Tooth Fairy” (*1/2 out of four) was a toothless horror story set in England in which a family (Claire-Maria Fox, Claudine Aumord, and others) are haunted and slaughtered by the gruesome title character who is out for revenge until they band together to try and stop him. By-the-numbers junk which no horror fan will want left under their pillow. What’s next? A horror movie about the Easter Bunny? Continue reading →
May 3, 2019 “Hell Girl” (* out of four) was an unholy mess about a young group of ghost hunters (Lauren Compton, Ana Maria Estrada, Greg Gastelum) searching for a demonic creature who impregnated a woman 160 years ago and they discover that (naturally) one of their team members is the ghost’s offspring and their team is being targeted for slaughter. Very quickly, though, you may find yourself rooting for the demon because none of the team members are very bright (or very likeable). One-time great character Tom Sizemore shows up as (what else?) a slimeball but someone needs to bring his career back from Hell. Continue reading →
May 2, 2019 “7:02: Only The Righteous” (*1/2 out of four) was an utterly stupid horror drama set on the night of Obama’s election win in 2008 in which six none-too-bright friends (Paul Antonie, Karina Bonnefil, Lela Elam, and others) congregate to celebrate his victory but the night doesn’t exactly go as planned. Believe me- none of these characters (or the filmmakers) will be running for office anytime soon. Attempt at making a horror story centered around politics and Obama’s presidential victory is a complete mess. Even at 1 hour and 14 minutes, this still feels padded and prolonged. Continue reading →
April 30, 2019 “Waiting For The Miracle To Come” (*1/2 out of four) was an incomprehensible drama about an aspiring trapeze artist (Charlotte Rampling) who discovers a cryptic letter from her recently deceased father which leads her on a spiritual and personal journey in the California desert. Bizarre and aloof story will either hold you in its spell or leave you cold but either way it’s extremely weird. Willie Nelson has a key role as a former vaudeville star but based on this misfire- he’s probably waiting for the miracle to come to revive his career. This sat on the shelf for 4 years after being made and should have stayed there. Continue reading →
April 29, 2019 “Body At Brighton Rock” (*1/2 out of four) was a drably done melodrama about a park ranger (Karina Fontes) who discovers a body in the mountain park she is covering and has to wait for the police while a creepy local man (Casey Adams) appears to be watching and following her. Never terribly compelling and never builds significant momentum, despite Fontes’ sincere and engaging performance. A 30-minute idea needlessly stretched out to an hour-and-a-half Continue reading →
April 28, 2019 “The Misguided” (*1/2 out of four) was an aptly titled misfire about a morally conflicted young man (Caleb Galati) in a sibling rivalry with his drug-addict brother (Steven J. Milhaljevich) and begins to date his former girlfriend and they plan to leave the city together but plans go awry which endangers all of them. Dreadful time-waster begins to pick up intensity in the second half but still goes nowhere. It’s hard to tell an involving character study when none of the characters are even slightly likeable. Moody cinematography (by the director Shannon Alexander) is film’s only asset. Continue reading →
April 27, 2019 “The Avengers: Endgame” (** out of four) was a disappointing final entry in this comic-book extravaganza series about the team of Avengers (Robert Downey, Jr., Chris Evans, Scarlett Johanson, and others) uniting to finally destroy Thanos (Josh Brolin) once and for all and restore unity and balance to the universe. More exhausting than exhilirating, as story drags at times and rehashes much of the events from previous entries, and goes on far too long at nearly three hours. Final 45 minutes when the Avengers and Thanos battle it out is fun for sure but getting there almost isn’t worth the effort. Continue reading →
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