June 23, 2019 “Clickbait” (* out of four) was a nonsensical “satire” of social media and internet sensations about a college student (Colby Stewart) who will do just about anything to obtain internet status who becomes kidnapped by a deranged fan and her reluctant roommate (Brandy Aguilar) is the only one who can save her. Why do any of these people think they’re our friends? For a more clever or scary or mildly intelligent look at the internet, watch “Unfriended” or “Her” instead. Click the X on this dumb and unpleasant movie. Continue reading →
June 23, 2019 “Strange Events 2” (* out of four) was a desperate horror sequel about an anthology of stories involving ghouls, ghosts, and various paranormal activity all coming to life. Each story is duller than the last. Speaking of which- when did anthology horror movies become so popular all of a sudden? This complete yawner should hopefully put this strange new trend in shutdown. This is only (repeat ONLY) for those who thought the original “Strange Events” was robbed at Oscar time. Continue reading →
June 22, 2019 “Say My Name” (*** out of four) was a roller-coaster madcap comedy about two strangers (Nick Blood and Lisa Brenner) who meet for a one-night stand which is interrupted by a robbery. They find themselves subsequently arrested and charged with the crime and have to escape, prove their innocence, and stay alive and find that they actually have fallen in love with another! Totally unbelievable but totally entertaining movie zig-zags from zany comedy to adventure to surprisingly touching drama all without losing its light and fun touch. Blood and Brenner’s terrific performance and chemistry makes key difference. Continue reading →
June 22, 2019 “Revenge Is A Choice” (* out of four) was an inept political thriller about a courageous African-Carribean woman (Ariel Castillo) who chooses to risk her life to obtain freedom and expose a human trafficking scandal which has murdered millions of unsuspecting immigrants. The seriousness of the issue completely eludes the makers of this fiasco. This mess makes Liam Neeson’s “Taken” (which covered some similar themes) look subtle by comparison. Don’t make the “choice” to waste your money on this time-waster. Continue reading →
June 22, 2019 “The Evil Inside Her” (*1/2 out of four) was an unholily derivative horror show about four friends (Melissa Kunnap, Brian Ashton Smith, Madeline Tesh, and Jeff Ryan Alexander) who vacation in the North Carolina wilderness but it soon turns into a fight for survival when they realize one of them is possessed and possibly deranged. “The Exorcist” meets “Paranormal Activity” meets “Wrong Turn” but this probably makes the movie sound more exciting than it really is. Eric Roberts is wasted in a throwaway role as a local cop. Even the beautiful North Carolina scenery looks drab. Continue reading →
June 22, 2019 “Wretch” (*1/2 out of four) was a wretched psychodrama about three friends (Megan Massie, Spencer Korcz, and Savannah Marie) who try to piece together memories of a drug-fueled night in the woods but soon realize there was a supernatural presence that threatens to kill all of them. Decent-enough opening soon leads nowhere, as film becomes repetitive, monotonous, and boring. More intelligent (and likeable) characters would surely have helped. Continue reading →
June 21, 2019 “Toy Story 4” (**1/2 out of four) was an unnecessary fourth entry in this wondrous series about the further adventures of Woody (voiced by Tom Hanks) and Buzz Lightyear (voiced by Tim Allen) and fellow toys as they are given to a new owner (voiced by Madeleine McGraw) and they embark on a road adventure. Full of the series’ usual eye-popping animation and the amiable characterizations and voices from previous entries but lacks the magic and heart that made the previous three such classics. Touching ending makes this worthwhile, especially for series fans, but this still marks the feel of going to the well once too often. Continue reading →
June 21, 2019 “Deep Murder” (0 stars out of four) was an abjectly painful “comedy” about a filmmaking crew (Christopher Macdonald, Jerry O’Connell, Jessica Parker-Kennedy, and others) making a soft-core porno film but a deranged killer makes his way onto the set and starts torturing the crew members (and the audience) slowly and painfully. Utterly moronic writing and direction and stupid characters make this a community service sentence to watch. This was written and directed by Comedy Central comedian Nick Corirossi. If this is the best material he can come up with, his feature-film career may be in deep shit. Continue reading →
June 21, 2019 “Winterskin” (* out of four) was a horrendous horror melodrama/black comedy about a man (David Lenik) who is shot in the snowy wilderness and seeks refuge in an isolated log cabin with a nutjob older woman (Rowena Bentley) and they both are subsequently stalked by a bloodthirsty and skinless creature who will do anything to get inside and satisfy its appetite. Opening 20 minutes actually isn’t bad; the rest is stupefyingly unwatchable. Terrible acting and unpleasant gore make this brutal, in every sense of the word. Continue reading →
June 21, 2019 “Escape Plan 3: The Extractors” (** out of four) was a middling third entry in this action series about security expert Ray Breslin (an aging and ever-wooden Sylvester Stallone) who is hired to kidnap the daughter (Malese Jow) of a Hong-Kong tech mogul but complications arise when Breslin’s girlfriend (Jaime King) is also captured. Not bad, with striking and stylish cinematography from Jacques Jouffret and some good hand-to-hand combat, but film never develops sufficient momentum. Stallone can play this role in his sleep by now and does in a few scenes. This one may as well have been easily called “Escape Of The Expendables.” Continue reading →
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